Let's call...the MONARCHS! CUE THEME MUSIC!

[luchia]

AND LO, THERE WAS A SCREAM OF HORROR THAT ECHOED THROUGH YOUR VERY SOUL AS LU STARED THE GREAT BEAST THAT IS HER PAPER'S DUE DATE IN THE FACE, AND KNEW TRUE FEAR.

EDIT. I am turning off my internet. Rawr.

EDITEDIT: This is my paper if it was the first two minutes of a horrible saturday morning cartoon.


SCENE: A government building in England is surrounded by frowning faces. ZOOM IN to a WORRIED MAN wringing his hands, pacing with his CARTOON BULLDOG sitting in an armchair nearby.

CARTOON BULLDOG:
Oh noooo, Ministerrrr! The people are getting critical of the government and there's trouble a'brewing on the seven seas while we race to keep our colonies and power! What'll we dooooo?

WORRIED MINISTER:
*SNAPS*
I know just what to do! Let's call the monarchs!

[CUE MONARCHS MAIN THEME]
The Monarchs, The Monarchs,
They're royal figureheads for you~
They don't have much power,
But they'll drink tea for an hour,
Because that'll reassure me too~
MONARCHS.

CUT TO JAPAN!!!!

CARTOON CAT:
Oh nooooo, the western world might try to colonize us if we don't look sufficiently 'modernized' to them! What'll we doooooo?

YET ANOTHER WORRIED MAN:
AHA!
I know just what to do! We'll call...the monarchs!

[CUE MONARCHS MAIN THEME. YES, AGAIN.]
The Monarchs, The Monarchs,
The Emperor's way better than you~
He parades around in uniform,
To Western ideals he'll conform,
And Japan will militarize too~
MONARCHS.

Comments

[kseda.livejournal.com]

*clambers, clings*

[theempress14.livejournal.com]

Please tell me someone in your paper can give you cancer, then turn into a car.